Tuesday, June 14, 2011

WICCAS: The REAL Reason for America’s Financial Crisis!


Meet the typical living-high-on-the-hog (apparently, ALL of the hog! LOL!) Negro family. They got a house even thought they had $65,000 in credit card debt (bling! bling!) and leases on a pimped-out Escalade and a Lexus 400 (both without car insurance and current tags) — even though they both work at Popeye’s Fried Chicken and the father is on AWOL from his parole officer!

Yes, it’s very easy to blame stupid, financially irresponsible Negroes for the current financial crisis.

But the Lord Jesus came to me when I was at T. J. Maxx and explained that the Negroes are not the sole (soul? LOL!) cause of the problem. You see, Jesus lays the blame squarely at the dirty, smelly feet of Wiccans! Apparently, Wiccas are more prevalent than I had realized. During the 90s, slack police protection allowed them to move into many normal neighborhoods throughout our formerly godly country. And their unsightly appearance and weird ways drove down home prices. And when the price of New Zealand lamb rose, Wiccas started stealing neighborhood pets and using them for sacrifices and dinner, scaring neighbors and prompting them to sell their homes below market price lest their darling kitty cats were slaughtered to make furry change purses and gutted for ceremonial jump ropes!

The result? Negroes with laughable credit were suddenly able to “afford” houses in real neighborhoods lived in by Wiccas! Of course, black people don’t pay their bills so the mortgages went into default, causing banks to falter, stocks to drop and our whole economy to go into the crapper.

It would be correct to blame Negroes for our current financial problems, but, as Jesus pointed out, the REAL culprit is god-hating, hygiene-impaired Wiccas!

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